no.stupid.answers

There are a lot of questions on WikiAnswers about Virgo, like this one. But the sixth sign of the zodiac, while a stellar topic, is not really the point of this post. Today in Tainted Love, we explore Virgos themselves. We’re here for some answers. So, folks, let’s see how we do.

Angry Virgo boy

How do I annoy thee? Let me count the ways. Ah, but this is no ordinary button-pushing. What we have here is a very special, very specific request:

What can you do to make a Virgo boy angry?

Virgos are known to be meticulous and reliable. To really irk a Virgo, try arriving late to his romantic dinner date and then telling him loudly (making a scene in the obviously sophisticated restaurant) that his tie knot is crooked. Alternatively, go to his apartment, unfold all his white undershirts, and toss them on the floor in a heap.

Online dating is not the only answer

So while you’re busy trying to make your boy angry, he’s got a totally different goal. He’s aiming for the opposite, and he desperately needs your help:

How does a Virgo boy attract a Virgo girl?

Please answer his question. If you do, he might just fall for you… and if you’re lucky, you’ll even notice :)

Virgo in love??

Virgos may wear love differently than the rest of us - at least, that would explain this question:

What are the signs a Virgo has fallen in love?

Perhaps Virgos aren’t as obvious (or amorous) as the other 11 signs. They’re shy (no public displays of affection) and practical (no sweeping things off desks in a moment of passion), not to mention perfectionistic, overcritical and easily worried. No wonder people can’t tell when a Virgo’s in love. And that brings us to our next question…

Silver lining!

What are the strengths of a Virgo?

That’s easy. They have a reputation for being honest. Reliable. Pure. And courteous. Among other things. And so we reach our happy and most natural ending:

What diamond is suitable for a Virgo?

Now go get your Virgo!

Special guest today! I’m pleased to present this week’s edition of WikiAnswers Wednesday, written by no other than the Rhyme Master. Ok, I don’t actually know who that is, and the rhyming is questionable at best… But who doesn’t love a good, creative answer once in a while?

What rhymes with cheeks?

“I see you have a problem with rhyming,

I certainly hope that I have replied with good timing!

I am the rhyme master,

I rhyme and eat pasta,

no one can rhyme faster!

To rhyme with ‘cheeks’

the following words

may be used on

any day of the weeks,

words like:

leaks,

peeks,

speaks,

seeks

and beak…

yo!

So just use your ears

and the rhyme master will

call to you in the wind,

do not fear!”

The upcoming Giants/Patriots game is the talk of the town. If you don’t know what game I’m talking about then you don’t deserve to read the rest of this entry…so stop right here.

We had to get in on the action so the latest featured topic over at WikiAnswers is, of course, the Super Bowl. Our special guest columnist, Jim, tuned in with some Super Bowl math to help us out today. Jim always comes through when we need him…he seems to know something about everything!

What are the expenses for both teams in the Super Bowl?

According to Jim…

The expenses for both teams in the Super Bowl can be answered by using simple Dionysian geometry. Take the mean number of players for each team and put them in a differential algorithm that calculates the basic cost of each player. Once you have this number, you can find out the expenses for each team.

I’ll save you the time and tell you what the results are. For the Patriots, it is 1.2 million dollars before taxes. For the Giants, it is 1.6 million dollars.

Don’t read any more if you don’t want to know the result of the Super Bowl. Patriots win 49-26!!!

While calculating expenses it’s also important not to forget that the Super Bowl means so much to so many countries, not just the US. For example, in Micronesia the Super Bowl is celebrated by reciting Homer’s Iliad and a nationwide Israeli folk dance. The Super Bowl brings out the best in cultural sharing throughout the world.

I hope this helps, and I’m always here for any super bowl questions you might have.
Finally, Meital, will you marry me?

—–

Huh? Is that a marriage proposal? I guess she’s the only who can answer THAT question…how about YOU go ahead and answer some of the other Super Bowl questions now!

Did you know that you can quickly send any question – answered or unanswered – to your friends, family or business associates?  This is a great way to share the fun of WikiAnswers, spread a little knowledge and even generate some help answering those tricky questions.

Have a budding comic in the family?  Consider sending them something from our Humor and Amusement Corner.  Imagine their laughter when the question ”When sign makers go on strike is anything written on their signs?” arrives in their in-box.  Or maybe your boss is really hooked on football.  Score some points by e-mailing him an interesting tidbit from the ever-growing Football History category. Simply choose a question and click the ‘Send to a Friend’ link located on the left under Question Tools.  Fill in the required fields and click ‘Send’.  It’s that easy… you can even customize your message.

Have fun and enjoy the site!

Today I’d like to introduce you to our special WikiAnswers Wednesday guest blogger: Jim.

Jim will be taking care of today’s Money and Credit question. Give it up for Jim, everybody:

Why are Kuwaiti dinars the highest valued currency?

The Kuwaiti dinar is the highest valued currency for three both important yet different reasons.

1. In 1679 the war between Latvia and France waged on into it’s 43rd year. People from all over the globe were placing bets on who would win, how long the war would last, and on how awful Latvian food could become given time to truly develop as a country. The result of this drove up speculation in the Yen market causing essentially the process of reverse osmosis to occur in Kuwait.

2. Green beans are really tasty if cooked correctly. I suggest sauteing with white wine, a little soy sauce and some tomatoes. delicious. The Kuwaitis do this well.

3. Have you ever seen Zoolander. If you have than all I have to say is “snap!” . The snap Zoolander sensation also helps explain Kuwait’s teenage pregnancy epidemic.

I hope this helps.

Jim

In life, sometimes you don’t always get the answers you want. Here is an example:

What is a 6-letter word with ‘e’ as the fifth letter?

Stop trying to cheat in Scrabble, punk! Cheating in games is for losers… sore losers, that is. And young children with low self esteem. Come on: think of the word on your own, get those extra bonus points and feel good about it, or suck it up.

There’s your answer. You disgust me.

*The answer is “letter.” Duh. Six letters. E. Go away.